84 days left to go

What a motha' fuckin' day yo! Woke up with a hang over. It's been a while since I drank last cause I can careless to anymore, just one of those Sunday nights home alone. Well let's just say never again! Over it! I don't want to wake up feeling like that again, thats to damn sure. Other than that today I feel like a hot fucking mess. And I feel like I don't have time to be a hot mess. I feel disgusting. I look disgusting. I'm broke. I have to plan this baby shower. Get my car fixed. Packing my stuff. I feel like getting no where. Nothing is getting done. Very fucking irritating. Time to get my head out of my ass and start getting to work. On that note I also hate that everything is going to cost money. Money that I don't have. Thank god for Kristen Lorello taking her class always gets me straight. Being here at the studio really helps me put my life in perspective. It turns my day around and makes whatever bad moments m going through alright actually. Sometimes I over analyze my time line and stress out when there is no need to, but I feel like right now I have all the right to stress and beat myself up cause really I'm fuckin' up. Whomp whomp! Well now thy my day is close to ending I do feel a lot better. Thanks to the amazing people, and atmosphere at deb's. So I have my list of shit I need to do. now to actually stay on top of it. Days like these are intriguing, emotions all over the place. Too much. But just glad to have the life I do and able to pick myself back up and keep going. Not a lot of people can do that it seems. Before I forget one thing I really can't stand (and this has to do with people in la) is when your walking down the street and smile and say hi to a random people and all you get is a mug face back. Hello. Dosnt take that many muscles to smile back at least. Even though I had a bad start to the day I always smile at people and say hi. But no one smiled back. Some random person could have made my day a little bit better but nope all shadiness. That's why I'd rather be in another place right than LA. nothing like home. Where the heart is. SF. Also I think getting laid will help. A lil boost of confidence. Just sayin. Lol. We shall see. Well I'm ready to get off my shift here at deb's and just start a new day. Add some sex somewhere in there in the mix. Well I think that is enough for the night. Catch ya later. Stay tuned.